Few people face as much scrutiny and examination as the First Lady of the United States, particularly following the recent launch of her eponymous biographical film by Amazon.
Yet much of the public’s interpretation of her demeanour is misplaced, according to a psychotherapist and confidence specialist.
For years, observers have concentrated on her reserved manner, frequently perceiving her typically neutral, seemingly aloof expression as unease, melancholy, or disconnection.
Nevertheless, behavioural specialist Shelly Dar suggests this may simply represent Melania establishing firm boundaries before audiences.
“When we analyse Melania Trump, it can look like she’s sad or worried, but what we’re really seeing is her restraint,” Dar explains, reports the Mirror US.
“Her public presence is so controlled and so neutral and very deliberate. And as First Lady, that restraint tightens even more because of the pressure and the cost of mistakes is very high.”
Melania Trump’s public persona is characterised by restricted facial movement, sparse gestures, and an unfailingly neutral bearing.
Dar observes that Melania’s constrained facial expressions and economical gestures typically result in her being perceived as “angry, cold, or uncomfortable,” rather than what she describes as an intentional absence of visible warmth.
“When warmth isn’t visible, people project sadness onto it,” Dar explains.
“Psychologically, her body language doesn’t communicate any emotions, it communicates boundaries. She doesn’t perform emotions for comfort, something that we’re used to in the Western world.”
She further emphasises how, within American and – more broadly – Western political contexts, First Ladies typically project contrasting qualities by displaying warmth and accessibility.
“In a culture that expects First Ladies to appear warm, expressive, and at ease, that lack of emotional display is easy to misread,” Dar states.
“When expression is limited, people tend to fill in the gaps themselves, often projecting anger or unhappiness where there may simply be control.
“She’s operating on a global stage, speaks publicly only when she has to, and communicates in a second language where every word is analysed,” Dar observes. “That level of scrutiny naturally leads to careful, rehearsed delivery and a more guarded presence.”
Dar clarifies that Melania’s body language conveys boundaries and precision instead of emotional transparency, “which can feel unsettling to audiences trying to decode her.”
When Melania is in Donald Trump‘s presence, however, Dar observes how her demeanour becomes increasingly restrained: “She appears more composed in solo appearances, where her posture and pacing feel steadier and more intentional. When she’s alongside her husband, her body language often tightens, less movement, more neutrality, which can signal role management rather than relational ease.
“She appears more self-possessed alone, and more guarded beside him, which suggests deliberate role separation rather than emotional disengagement.”